Daily Life Lessons from Rabbi Heschel
Day 91
“God is unwilling to be alone, and man cannot forever remain impervious to what He longs to show. Those of us who cannot keep their striving back find themselves at times within the sight of the unseen and become aglow with its rays. Some of us blush, others wear a mask. Faith is a blush in the presence of God.” (Man is Not Alone pg. 91)
Continuing to experience Rabbi Heschel’s words and teachings above causes one to think deeply about the word “blush”. The most common usage of the word is to “show shyness, embarrassment, or shame by becoming red in the face” according to an online dictionary. Using this definition in reading the penultimate sentence above would hint at us being embarrassed by God’s rays, our being shy to approach God and experience God’s light, and/or feel shame at being in God’s presence. While all three of these experiences are good descriptors, I believe Rabbi Heschel is also teaching us something more.
Being one of the “some of us blush” group I believe is a description of the redness/glow we experience after being seen by God and/or by another human being. This blush is the blush of connection, not disconnection; it is the blush of color that comes from being seen and welcomed, not the color that comes from fear of being seen; it is the blush that comes from joy of acceptance, not the color from the despair of being cast out. We are so afraid to “blush” because we do not realize the power and the beauty of our “blush”, we do not understand our “blush” as joy of being known rather than the embarrassment of being caught. We have been conditioned to accept the conventional notions of the word blush and this causes us to ‘shy’ away from blushing.
Moses had this blush after his encounter with God on Mount Sinai and it stayed with him so he had to wear a veil in public. Rabbi Heschel had this “blush” about him and he radiated the rays he acquired with each encounter with “the unseen” he experienced, which were many. This “blush” these “rays” do not come from the mendacity of the “false prophet” or ‘self-serving charismatic leader’, they come from an authentic encounter with the “unseen” and the commitment to keep the “blush”, aka “fresh color” alive inside of us as well as reflect it in our work life, our family life, in our entire life.
Love is an example of a “blush” of connection and being seen and being accepted. Yet, think about how often we hide when first meeting people. “Put your best foot forward” and other cliches have become normal thinking and advice for most people yet couldn’t that prevent us from an authentic connection, for a joyous “blush”? Rabbi Heschel, I think, is telling us that with every encounter, we get to be seen by the “unseen”, the Tzelem/God Image of another human being, the Ineffable One of the Universe, and the inner parts of ourselves that we hide from. If we don’t allow ourselves to be seen by our lover, is it really love? I am thinking that the hiding, the refusal to accept our being good enough to be seen and accepted, our refusal to “blush” is the root cause of divorces. Keeping our “blush”/color fresh each day is also a critical way to grow our love for another human being, for humanity in general, for our self, for God, for the universe. How often do we express gratitude to our spouse, lover, children, parents, siblings, co-workers, employees, supporters, friends, strangers, for their being in our world?
“Some of us blush” is a call to action; experience the glow and warmth of this “blush” as an experience of being known and accepted, of being seen and loved, of being admired for our radiating rays from our soul/inner life. Using the word “blush” teaches us the impossibility of faking this experience. It is impossible, I believe, to fake a blush that comes up from one’s heart and soul. This “blush” needs no words, it needs no explanations, actions on our part, it just needs to be shown and seen, felt and embraced. As I write this, this morning, I feel the “blush” and pray I never lose this “fresh color”; another definition of blush.
In recovery, we are constantly seeking to be seen and to blush. We know our blushes come from our core and, usually, we see this as being seen for our flaws. As we progress in our recovery, we blush when a compliment is issued, not from shame nor false humility, rather from being seen and acknowledged. We also see the glow of another human being and appreciate, share and bask in the glow of their blush instead of being jealous, hiding and/or trying to imitate another person.
I have been red in the face over the years for many reasons and not all of them good/holy! Yet, in reflecting back, I realize how often the redness, the bluster, the loudness came from so deep in my core, my soul and it was my way of expressing the different experiences I had/have in those/these moments with “the unseen”, with God. I also know the inner glow of being seen by both “the unseen” and by the person in front of me. The “blush” happened whether people accepted and embraced me or rejected and exiled me, as I reflect back on my past. Either way, accepting or rejecting, embracing or exiling, came from people seeing the result of my experience of being “seen by the unseen” and some people wanted to join this experience and some didn’t, some people accept the authentic me and some people don’t. The “blush”, however, keeps me real and living authentically. Happy 2022 and stay safe and God Bless, Rabbi Mark