Daily Life Lessons from Rabbi Heschel
Year 4 Day 229
“Israel feels a certain ease and delight in the fulfillment of the law which to a hired servant is burdensome and perplexing. For “the son who serves his father serves him with joy, saying, Even if I do not entirely succeed [in carrying out His commandments], yet, as a loving father, He will not be angry with me. In contrast, a hired servant is always afraid lest he may commit some fault, and therefore serves God in a condition of anxiety and confusion.” (God in Search of Man pg.406)
What Rabbi Heschel is saying here is crucial to our way of living. While “Israel feels a certain ease and delight in the fulfillment of the law” may seem farfetched to some, the idea is very important to the way We the People are going to choose to live. There is a tremendous difference between a person who is ‘obligated/has to’ do a task, even a good deed and a person who is ‘obligated/gets to do a mitzvah, even something that doesn’t ‘feel’ good, that seems harsh, like rebuking someone because of their behavior. While both people are doing “the next right thing”, the difference between “Israel” and “a hired servant” is that “Israel” is moved to a higher understanding of living, seeing a higher purpose in their lives and an excited for what is to come, what one is going to learn and grow into; while “a hired servant” is going to stay stuck in resentments, looking for how they are ‘put upon’, how ‘they’ are out to get him/her, and never being able to see past their own selfishness, self-centeredness. I want to be clear that I am not talking about a slave-Rabbi Heschel is very specific in his choice of words, “a hired servant”.
On this 19th day of Elul, entering the home stretch prior to Rosh Hashanah, isn’t it time to take a look within ourselves and determine when we are living as “a hired servant”, as a person who lives as a victim, who constantly is telling everyone how they are right and being put upon, who is resentful and serves with anger and a shield so the mitzvah can never penetrate their inner life, who is unwilling to “circumcise the foreskin of their hearts”. These are the people who have a check-list of mitzvahs they do each day/need to do each day and while they are always smiling when doing them, their inner lives are not changed, their belief system of they do it right and everyone else is wrong, their actions towards the stranger are horrendous, they don’t “love their neighbor” nor are they opposed to “putting a stumbling block before the blind, cursing the deaf, having different weights and measures ‘for the goyim’, etc. We the People cannot overlook the times we are acting in the same ways, albeit nuanced, yet, still “put upon”, feeling “not recognized”, thinking “don’t you know who I think I am”, as a member of AA said to me at my first meeting and then he started to laugh. In our inventory, in our replaying of the video of this past year, We the People are being called by the words above to let go of our “anxiety and confusion” and see ourselves for our flaws as well as our greatness, have mercy upon ourselves just as God has mercy upon us and acknowledge the areas of life that are difficult for us to be in acceptance of, the areas where we still need to compete and compare, the areas where “the next right thing” is “burdensome and perplexing”. If we are to grow along spiritual lines, if we are to experience the 30 seconds of being completely clean in our soul, connected and embraced by the Ineffable One, we must do this work, We the People must see the areas where we are uncomfortable and fearful, resentful and feel victimized.
We the People are also being called on this 19th day of Elul to see and acknowledge when we are “Israel”, when we are fulfilling the Divine’s will with “ease and delight”, when we are excited to see how we can serve another(s) and ourselves in this day, in this hour, in this moment. Rather than being afraid, it is important for us to see how we serve with joy and where we can learn and grow. Living as “Israel” as described above, gives us the opportunity to welcome our imperfections, embrace our errors in judgment and action, appreciate the rebukes we get from another(s), and roll away the boulders that are in front of the blind, speak in sign language to the deaf, not have one set of standards for ‘our kind’ and another for ‘those people’, etc. Living as “Israel”, means to welcome the stranger as Abraham did, meditate and pray for the wellbeing of another as Isaac did, wrestle with one’s negative nature as Jacob did, take care of business and be loving to a mother who hated him like Esau did, hold onto the covenantal love even when our partner hurts us. Living as “Israel” is to live above the fray, to embody “radical amazement”, to keep learning by seeing everything new, by not being tied down by ‘societal ways’, ‘optics’, ‘what we did yesterday/this is the way we always do it’.
This High Holy Day Season, I pray that my colleagues find new ways to transmit the joy of the Holy Days, to see Yom Kippur as “a day like a wedding”, to stop ‘beating our chests’ and start massaging our strengths, to admit our errors out loud-beginning with the Clergy, to have people tell the stories of those for whom We the People are saying Kaddish for at the Yizkor Service, for the Clergy to speak to and about “the holiness that abides in our guts”, that “we are all standing at Sinai”, that “the world depends on us”, that “serve in joy and in truth” is paramount to a good life. Stop being “a hired servant” and start being “Israel”, one who belongs, one who is given a task, the true meaning of “being the chosen people”, and is grateful for the opportunity to serve, to grow and to learn. This is the path my Rabbinate took, it is the path my life took and I am IMPERFECT! I serve in and with joy, I am optimistic about today and tomorrow, I believe in the basic goodness of humanity and I see the evil that is abounding, clothed in the robes of the Clergy-like the Kingdoms of Israel and Judea- and I pray WE THE PEOPLE wake the fuck up! God Bless and stay safe, Rabbi Mark