Daily Life Lessons from Rabbi Heschel
Day 128
“Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, let not the mighty man glory in his might; but let him who glories glory in this: that he has a sense of ultimate embarrassment. How embarrassing for man to be the greatest miracle on earth and not understand it! (Who is Man pg 112)
Are we embarrassed by our lack of understanding of the miracle we are? Have we truly immersed ourselves in and delight in the miraculous nature of being human? It seems not, by all accounts, unfortunately. Engaging in mendacity and self-deception are embarrassments and degradations of our miraculous nature and being. We seem to constantly forget that all of us are created in the Image of God, not just some of us, and this deception allows us, gives us cover for, our prejudices, our exclusions, our disdain for another group of people, our judgmental behaviors towards groups of people we have never met, and our mistreatment of one another. The behavior of humankind towards one another is an embarrassment and a denial of the miracle we all are.
We have bought the lies of the people who are the interpreters of the Bible, of Philosophers, of History, etc rather than immersing ourselves in the texts themselves. We deny our miraculous nature by being lazy, by reading the Cliff Notes on how to live and what is important. All of the Hebrew Bible delineates the miraculous experience of being connected to God, connected to community, connected to family and connected to the core of one’s self. Yet we are willing to buy the BS of some people who speak about the “Angry God” of the “Old Testament” and we are willing to use the Sages and Rashi as our interpreters of the Bible rather than understanding how it speaks to each of us. While it makes sense and is a good thing to use the wisdom of our ancestors, it is not okay just to accept their experiences as our own. We all have an inner life and we all need to do our own immersion in the texts and find our unique application of these Eternal Truths and Wisdom found therein. It is time for all human beings to see themselves in the text, stop believing and going along with the lies of the charlatans and the wisdom of our ancestors alone because we are not meant to live the lives of our ancestors, we are created to live the miracles we are as individuals, the unique word of God we bring that no one else can bring and the unique and miraculous healing we bring to the world, the divine need we were created to fill/repair.
Understanding the miraculous nature of being human is a journey to the core of our soul, to the relationship with God/Higher Power/Big Bang, and an adjustment to the interrelationship every human being has with another human being. We are blessed with a sense of embarrassment in order to return to our miraculous nature, to return to a new understanding of how to return the love God gives us to God through our loving one another. No other creature on earth has the ability, the direction and the joy of living a life of holiness, a life of creating, a life of worship, a life of joy, a life of fulfillment, and we are embarrassed when we are not living these gifts that we have been given. Our prayers are meant to help us look inside ourselves to see how miraculous our bodies are, how miraculous our minds our and the miracle of being connected soul to soul to one another and to God/Higher Power.
Staying embarrassed is not a punishment, as I am understanding Rabbi Heschel today, its a gift! It keeps us right sized, not too big and not too small. It gives us the strength to speak up and speak out for the sake of God, for the sake of another human being, for the sake of humanity. Staying embarrassed propels us to overthrow the injustices of our society, let go of the lies of the enslavers, remind ourselves that money, property, prestige does not make us more human, better humans, only in the use of our money, property and prestige can we improve our lives and the lives of another human being. We stay embarrassed in a healthy manner through service, through kindness, through acting justly, through love.
In recovery, we are engaged in a battle within our self-one part wants to feed our egos and be ‘the most spiritual’ being possible or at least in the room-another part wants to live in harmony, right-sized, and accepting help and being of service when and where appropriate. In recovery, we are aware of the constant nature of this battle and we know our harmonious, right-sized, asking for help and helping another has to get stronger each and every day. This is one of the ways we stay embarrassed.
Oy, while I know that I have and continue to live in the embarrassment Rabbi Heschel is speaking about, I am also aware the times I have fought this truth by overcompensating and being wrong-sized. I am aware of the times I have fought to be right rather than learn and I am embarrassed by these actions. I also know the majority of my past 33 years has been spent living an embarrassed life because of the ways I haven’t understood how to live the miraculous nature of being me. I also know I have helped many people find their own path to their own embarrassment which has propelled them to living one grain of sand better each day alongside of me. I am rejoicing in my embarrassment rather than hiding in shame, I use this experience to learn, to grow and to change. After all, isn’t the process of T’Shuvah an acknowledgement of our embarrassment and how to understand our miracle of being a little better? God Bless and stay safe, Rabbi Mark