Daily Life Lessons from Rabbi Heschel
Day 85
“When the soul of man is asked: What is God to you? there is only one answer that survives all theories which we carry to the grave: He is full of compassion. The Tetragrammaton, the great Name, we do not know how to pronounce, but we are taught to know what it stands for: “compassion”” (Man is Not Alone pg 148)
Earlier on this page Rabbi Heschel teaches: “His compassion is not mere emotion; it is blazing with the power of which only He is capable.” Being “full of compassion” the Ineffable One continually ‘suffers with’ us human beings, continually sends messengers and messages to us with a power and force that is so overwhelming we usually hide from them, get angry with them, reject them and find ourselves deeper and deeper in our victimhood, our rightness/righteous indignation, fear of change, protective shell, prejudice, etc. This, of course, sets us apart from authentic self, covenantal community, I/Thou connections, ability to live in the both/and, the ability to see another person with whom we disagree as a human being, etc.
People are always trying to prove “With God on our side”, as Bob Dylan sang about in 1964, we can do anything and it is ‘right’! Slavery was/is okay because “God is on our side”, it was okay to kill the early Christians by the Romans because the ‘gods were on their side’, anti-semitism flourishes because these same early Christians believed “God is on our side”, mistreatment of Native Americans was/is defended because “God is on our side”, Christians killing indigenous populations if they did not accept Christ was congruent with their belief that “God was on our side”, racism is never far from the surface because some white people believe “God is on our side”, some authoritarians are saying that “God is on our side” too! Rabbi Heschel’s teaching above is the prooftext of the fallacy, narcissistic, male-dominated, power-grabbing, people hating lies that have been passed down for generations.
God suffers with all of us! Beggar and thief, Clergy and non-believer, rich and poor, boss and employee, taskmaster and slave, men and women regardless of sexual orientation and/or gender identification, etc all are worthy and can experience God suffering with us. The problem is that we are not aware of our own inner suffering, our own need for compassion. Self-compassion, I believe, is to be able to sit with one’s self and allow our souls to suffer with our inner feelings, suffer with our thoughts and emotions that always seem to ‘get us’. We do not ask for these thoughts, feelings and emotions-many are from earlier traumas-and we try so hard to rid ourselves of them rather than allowing God, through our souls, ‘suffers with’ these experiences and lead us to healing, to a path out of living in these past feelings and emotions, to seeing ourselves as worthy of God’s compassion, worthy of allowing our soul to ‘suffer with’ our self, and knowing we are worthy of authentic connection.
God cares about the widows, the orphans, the poor, the needy and the stranger, according to the first 5 Books of the Bible. God tells us to ‘suffer with’ these people and, I would add, see ourselves in all of these categories as well. We get to ‘suffer with’, be compassionate with, another human being when we are able to see our own needs for compassion and receive it from another person and from God and our soul. I use ‘get to’ because living in compassion and love for another is, as I am understanding Rabbi Heschel today, the highest form of Imitatio Dei, being Godly, Godlike.
The charlatans that promote hatred, fear, prejudice, towards anyone that isn’t them are NOT people of faith even though they wrap themselves in the Bible. These ‘religious conservatives are trying to co-opt God for their own power, money, narcissistic goals, not for God, not for compassion and love!
In recovery, we seek to recover our ability to be compassionate and to ‘suffer with’ our selves and another(s) self. The difference being that to ‘suffer with’ is not the same as being in suffering. The later is a state of being that traps us into isolation, negativity, self-loathing, anger, etc. ‘Suffer with’ is a state that allows us to heal, to connect, to receive love and to give healing, connection and love to another(s) soul/self.
I am more aware of the ways I have fallen into ‘suffering’ as opposed to allow myself to open to another person and God to ‘suffer with’ me. Tonight is the 56th Yahrzeit (anniversary) of my father’s death according to the Jewish Calendar and my ‘suffering’ led to over 20 years of denying almost everything my father believed in and stood for. My suffering kept me in a prison that made the jails and prisons I did visit/live in seem easy and comfortable. My suffering led me deeper and deeper into anger at my self, the world, even my father for abandoning me. It was in a jail cell where I heard God calling to me to ‘suffer with’ me and help lead me out of my ‘suffering’. Many people conflate these two ways of being and I have learned the difference through Rabbi Heschel, Torah, my spiritual guides and teachers, my wife and daughter, siblings and extended family. I am also celebrating 1 year of coming out of another ‘suffering’ experience which lasted “only” 8 months instead of 20+ years-progress not perfection! Stay safe and God Bless, Rabbi Mark